It’s been awhile since I’ve updated my blog! Hmmm where to begin? Easter weekend was quite an eventful weekend here! On Saturday, our group threw a “stadium bash” for all of Gulu. Yes, like literally. It was CRAZY! Lewie and a couple of other people in our group worked really hard to put it together, and despite a few mishaps, it was a huge success!! We originally wanted to throw a block party for the whole community, but the road we wanted to block off is one of the main streets the buses use, so that plan was nixed. After much brainstorming, we realized that my host dad is the district sports officer and is in charge of the stadium in town. The district speaker in the local government happens to be our homestay coordinator, so he was helping us during our brainstorming session, and he said that we would be the first group to every throw a big free party in the stadium! My dad said he would let us use it for free as long as we cleaned up afterwards, and we were on our way! Lewie arranged for all of the biggest artists/bands in Gulu to perform, got a phone company to sponsor the party (paying for the sound system and stage) and got a beer company to sell beer, soda and water. The party went from 6pm-4am and our teacher estimated that there were 5000-6000 people there! I had randomly brought a pack of glowsticks with me from the US (to give out to the kids in my family) and a couple of us thought it would be so fun to wear them to the party… WRONG!! I have no idea why we thought that would be a good idea, considering we already stand out enough as muzungus and definitely do not need anything else to call attention to ourselves. As soon as we walked into the stadium, we were SURROUNDED by about 50 people, mostly young men. They all started literally grabbing at the glowsticks around our wrists, neck and in our hair, and one guy yelled, “Give me your fire!!” We tried to fend them off, and when we realized that that wasn’t going to work, we started trying to give them to the kids in the circle. The grabbing intensified, and we finally just through them up in the air and bolted out of the circle of people. It was quite an experience. It wasn’t all that funny at the time, but looking back at it now, it must have been quite a hilarious sight. Needless to say, I don’t think I’ll be able to look at glowsticks the same way ever again!
The next day was Easter Sunday. I met a couple of the other girls to help clean the stadium and it was a huge mess! (Imagine 5000-6000 people in an enclosed structure in a country where it is the norm to throw trash on the ground…) It didn’t actually didn’t end up taking all that long since there we several of us. I then went to get come pictures printed of my host family and I to put in the album that I was going to give them later that day as a thank you gift, and then went home for our Easter/welcome Freesia/Good-bye Freesia feast. My family was so sweet and had made A TON of food, and some of the neighbors came over to join the party. I learned that in Acholi culture, it is traditional for the guest to eat the gizzard of the chicken because it is a delicacy. After eating SOOO much other food, there was just no way that I was going to be able to down that, so I luckily managed to pawn it off onto my host mom, who enjoyed it much more than I would have. I gave my host family the blanket that my real mom had crocheted for them as a thank you for having me and they really liked it! It was nice to feel like my two families are connected. My host dad had been asking about when he was going to get to talk to my real dad (because he had already spoken to my mom when I had run into him by coincidence while I was walking home talking to her one day), so after the meal I called my parents back home, and my host mom and dad talked to my real mom and dad! These two worlds seem so separate, so it was cool to be able to share a piece of the other part of life with each of them.
Sometime during the last week or so that I was with my family, my host mom told me a little about her experiences during the war as we were in the kitchen chopping vegetables for dinner. She said that for several years, she was constantly running, sleeping in whatever seemed to be the best hiding spot at the time. She had a baby and a three-year-old and she couldn’t carry both of them so she joined up with another group of people who could take care of the three-year-old. This part was a little unclear, I’m not sure if she was actually with those people the whole time or if she gave them her son to take care of for awhile and then got him back when it was safe to settle down again. She explained that it was not safe to live at home because the rebels might attack at any time, so it was better to be constantly moving. They had very little food and were often hiding behind trees, terrified of what would happen if they were discovered. The other people in my group and I had talked about the fact that for whatever reason, the conflict did not feel as real to us as the genocide had in Rwanda. These are clearly two very different situations, but when I was talking to my mom about her experiences, I realized that the conflict did not feel as real because I really hadn’t heard many people talk about their personal experiences of the war. As I was sitting with her, seeing the pain on her face and hearing it in her words as she described how difficult those years had been, the conflict felt much more real and personal.
The day before we left our families we had a big party with all of our families and some of our lecturers. (That weekend involved a lot of parties I guess!) We ate dinner, people made some speeches, and we did some traditional dancing with a local dance group. We hadn’t all met each other’s families, so it was fun to meet them and be able to place the stories we had told about our experiences in our homestay. The next day we left for Kampala, the capital of Uganda. Kampala is about a five hour drive from Gulu. While in Kampala, we stayed at the same hotel we had stayed at for our first few nights in Africa at the very beginning of this whole experience, and the same hotel that we will be staying at for our last few nights before he say good-bye and fly home. It felt a little weird to be there because in my head I had kind of compartmentalized it as the beginning and the end, so it made me a little disoriented about where we were in the semester (that sounds a little weird, but it somehow made sense in my head…) It was really interesting to compare the way we all thought of the hotel compared to the first time we had stayed in it. We all agreed that we had found it kind of grundgy the first time around, but now we thought it was such a luxury! It’s crazy to see how perspectives change. It had warm water, toilets that flushed pretty consistently, air conditioning, and cereal for breakfast, all of which we were pretty excited about! We had the last of our lectures while there, and spent the rest of the time trying to eat as much American food as possible. I ate two cheeseburgers, two cheeseburgers, and two ice cream cones in three days! It was amazing! On our last day before the independent study period began, we all went to Jinja, a town about two hours away from Kampala. We took a boat on the Nile to this little peninsula. Our guide pointed to a spot in the water and told us that this was the source of the Nile, the exact place where it switches from Lake Victoria to the Nile. Apparently, a ton of different places all claim to have the source of the Nile, so who knows which is right, but it was still cool to see! Later in the day we went to another part of the Nile to look at these waterfall/rapid things. Our academic director told us that in two years, everything we were currently looking at would be underwater, because they are building a dam a little ways down the river in order to generate energy for Southern Sudan. It was so sad to think that such a beautiful place would seen be covered in water.
After our time in Kampala and Jinja, many of us took a bus back to Gulu to begin our Independent Study Projects. As we were driving into Gulu, I was relieved to be back and happy to find that Gulu felt like home! During the ISP, I am living with four of the other girls and I are staying in a hotel that is owned by one of the girls’ host parents. This has proved very eventful, including our attempt to make macaroni and cheese on a charcoal stove… we failed. For my research, I am looking at how leadership development programs for youth in Northern Uganda are trying to empower this generation of youth and end the cycle of poor leadership in Uganda. I spent my first week (last week) at a school called Restore Leadership Academy, which is a Christian secondary school that focuses on leadership and character development. I conducted three focus group interviews with the students, had the kids fill out some questionnaires and interviewed two regular teachers, the deputy head teacher, and the head teacher. It has been a little tricky because all of the schools are getting out for vacation this Friday, so the only two weeks that I am able to spend in the schools is during their exam period. I finished up there today, and I think I was still able to get enough information. The other initiative I am focusing is called KOBS (Knowledge of Behavior and Self) and is a curriculum that has just been introduced into the schools that Invisible Children works with. If it is thought to be successful in two years, then it will likely be implemented into all of the schools in Northern Uganda. The curriculum focuses on topics like self-esteem and friendship building, conflict avoidance and conflict resolution, motivation and goal setting and dealing with worries and stress. Last week I interviewed a teacher who helped create the curriculum and a teacher who is currently teaching the material, and on Thursday I will interview students who have taken the class this term. Though this curriculum is not specifically a “leadership curriculum,” I think it teaches many of the things that are needed in order for the youth of Northern Uganda to move past the difficulties they faced in their childhoods due to the war, and become successful leaders. I still figuring how it is all going to come together, but I’m really excited about this topic and think I might really want to continue focusing on leadership development for youth and adolescents when I get back to the US!
One day last week my friend Anne and I went with two of the Invisible Children engineers and the education officer to five of Invisible Children’s partner schools, including the one that we raised money for in high school! It was really exciting to see the schools and the progress that is being made on them, and to meet some of the teachers and headmasters. It reaffirmed for me how important the work that Schools for Schools is doing is, because these schools are really benefitting from the money that is being raised by the students in the US! Many of the schools were extremely damaged during the war or have always been lacking certain necessities, and by rebuilding the schools, IC is helping to create an environment that is much more conducive to learning. So exciting to see the schools in real life, especially to connect my experiences raising money in the US with the reality here!
Tuesday, April 20, 2010
Sunday, April 11, 2010
Pictures of Uganda!
We saw zebras on the drive from Kampala to Gulu!
We got really excited about the source of the nile!
Part of my host family with the beautiful blanket my real mom crocheted for them!
My sister and some of the neighbor kids!
My host mom and I practicing our African dance skills!
We like to climb trees...
Thursday, April 1, 2010
Gender issues in Uganda
A couple of weeks ago we visited the Acholi Cultural Center, which involves the local chiefs in preserving Acholi culture and promoting development in this region. We spent the majority of the conversation discussing Acholi views towards women and what they are doing to promote gender equality, which is one of their four main goals.
When we asked if women can hold the position of chief or if any other leadership positions in the tribe are open to women, he said that women are allowed to hold one of the highest leadership positions that exist- being a mother and taking care of the household. WHAT?! Yes, being a mother is extremely important, but that is not the same thing as actually having the opportunity to hold a leadership position in the tribe! He said that each district must have a female representative, but it basically sounds like this one woman is the main voice for the women in that area and is the token “women’s representative,” but that women don’t really hold many (or any) positions of power that are open to both men and women. He said that women are beginning to become more active in decision-making within the tribe. Women are now allowed to own land, but because certain cultural norms have existed for such a long time, it will be a process to change what people consider “normal” and acceptable. I definitely think that it has to be a process, but it made me really uncomfortable to hear how they (the men we spoke to) were talking about women, because it seemed pretty disrespectful towards women in many instances. They spoke about how in the past, it was completely acceptable for a man to force a women to sleep with him whether she protested or not, because “even if she says she doesn’t want to, she actually does and is just pretending.” Um, what? One girl in our group pointed out later in a debrief that women often pretend to want to sleep with their partner because they feel like they should, even if they don’t feel like it, NOT the other way around. I know that it is not like this anymore, but it was still disturbing to hear how these men were talking about rape so casually, and even laughing at times.
It has been really interesting to speak with both men and women here about their perceptions of the current status of women in Uganda. Both men and women have told me that women face many challenges, especially in terms of marriage. Because of the tradition of bride price (the same as a dowry), the man’s family pretty much buys the woman. This means that if they have marriage problems or if the woman is being abused by her husband, her family will often force her to stay with him because his family paid for her. Because of this, many women are trapped in bad marriages, and if they do leave their husband, they are left with nothing. I imagine this must create a feeling of helplessness among women in this situation-you have no support to leave, but it is also miserable to stay.
Another issue people have mentioned is polygamy, which is still largely practiced here. One woman I met told me that it can be very upsetting for a woman to be in a marriage like this because the wives are often not treated equally, and some are treated much better than others. (I met a guy who told me that his dad has 15 wives and 48 children!! He said that this is extremely rare, but still!) She said that this can create tension between a man’s wives, and sometimes a man will get tired of some of his wives, (when he has many) he will get rid of some of them. She also said that even if a woman thinks she is in a monogamous marriage, there is still a large chance that her husband is cheating on her. She told me that she would leave her husband immediately if he tried to get another wife, but since she is working in Gulu and he is working in Kampala, she just has to trust that he is staying faithful to her.
It has been interesting to study the dynamic in my host family because my dad has two wives. One of them is younger (31) and does not speak any English (I don’t know whether that indicates something about her education level because all of the children are taught English in school?) She seems kind of quiet and pretty subservient, and doesn’t seem to interact very much with the husband. The other wife is older (about his age), speaks English pretty well, and seems to have more power in terms of running the household. It’s hard for me to get a sense of the dynamic between the two women, but they seem to live together fine, eat together, and share a lot of the housework. I haven’t seen any animosity between the two women, but I’m not sure if they are particularly close either. One of my mothers explained to me that a big problem for women in Uganda is that they have to do all of the work in the household, while the man does nothing around the house. This means that the woman is constantly working, which is exhausting and can lead to major health problems. I think that this is a huge problem for women all over the world, and one of the first steps towards changing the status of women is to begin within the household. This is such a difficult process because it involves fighting long-standing norms and requires the cooperation of both the man and the women- the woman has to be strong about the role she wants in the relationship, and the man has to support that and take on an equal share of the work in the household. The structural changes need to be made to enable women to gain leadership positions and have equal opportunities and rights, but I do think that both here and at home, changes within the household would be a major first step.
In the few weeks I have been in Gulu, I have seen/heard of many instances of domestic violence. One night during dinner we heard a ton of children suddenly begin crying and yelling nearby. My mother and siblings all ran over to see what was happening, and it turned out that our neighbor’s husband had just gotten home drunk and was beating his wife in front of their children. My mother told me about it when she returned home, and it was really disturbing to me how commonplace this seemed. A few nights ago, there was a woman eating dinner with us who I had never seen before, and my mother told me that she is their niece, who had run away from her abusive husband. Both of her parents have passed away, so I think my family was her closest family, and so she had ridden on the back of pickup trucks and taken many different taxis to get to our house. She explained that this woman’s husband is very stubborn and beats her badly. She said that she will likely stay with us until her husband comes to get her. It is awful to think that this woman will probably have to go back to her abusive husband. Last night, the woman’s mother in law stayed at our house, apparently to speak with the woman and with my family about what they should do about the situation. Apparently the father-in-law will be coming to our house in the next few days, and then shortly after that the woman’s husband will come to work things out and bring her back with him. It is so interesting how involved the two families are in the relationship between this man and woman, and it was really interesting to sit in our kitchen hut eating dinner with my mother, this woman, and this woman’s abusive husband’s mother, an unusual combination! I wonder what the role of the mother-in-law is in this situation, and if she sides more with the woman or with her son.
I have heard really mixed opinions on the progress that has been made for women. Some people have made it sound like it is much better now, and other made it sound like there are still MAJOR problems. My guess is that both are true- it has gotten a lot better but there is still a LONG WAY to go. In order to change the situation, initiatives are going to have to be taken on several different levels- in government, through legal mechanisms, within the community, and on the family level, and target many different groups-men, women, government officials, villagers, etc. This is definitely not unique to Uganda however, I think initiatives like this need to take place in nearly all (if not all) parts of the world.
When we asked if women can hold the position of chief or if any other leadership positions in the tribe are open to women, he said that women are allowed to hold one of the highest leadership positions that exist- being a mother and taking care of the household. WHAT?! Yes, being a mother is extremely important, but that is not the same thing as actually having the opportunity to hold a leadership position in the tribe! He said that each district must have a female representative, but it basically sounds like this one woman is the main voice for the women in that area and is the token “women’s representative,” but that women don’t really hold many (or any) positions of power that are open to both men and women. He said that women are beginning to become more active in decision-making within the tribe. Women are now allowed to own land, but because certain cultural norms have existed for such a long time, it will be a process to change what people consider “normal” and acceptable. I definitely think that it has to be a process, but it made me really uncomfortable to hear how they (the men we spoke to) were talking about women, because it seemed pretty disrespectful towards women in many instances. They spoke about how in the past, it was completely acceptable for a man to force a women to sleep with him whether she protested or not, because “even if she says she doesn’t want to, she actually does and is just pretending.” Um, what? One girl in our group pointed out later in a debrief that women often pretend to want to sleep with their partner because they feel like they should, even if they don’t feel like it, NOT the other way around. I know that it is not like this anymore, but it was still disturbing to hear how these men were talking about rape so casually, and even laughing at times.
It has been really interesting to speak with both men and women here about their perceptions of the current status of women in Uganda. Both men and women have told me that women face many challenges, especially in terms of marriage. Because of the tradition of bride price (the same as a dowry), the man’s family pretty much buys the woman. This means that if they have marriage problems or if the woman is being abused by her husband, her family will often force her to stay with him because his family paid for her. Because of this, many women are trapped in bad marriages, and if they do leave their husband, they are left with nothing. I imagine this must create a feeling of helplessness among women in this situation-you have no support to leave, but it is also miserable to stay.
Another issue people have mentioned is polygamy, which is still largely practiced here. One woman I met told me that it can be very upsetting for a woman to be in a marriage like this because the wives are often not treated equally, and some are treated much better than others. (I met a guy who told me that his dad has 15 wives and 48 children!! He said that this is extremely rare, but still!) She said that this can create tension between a man’s wives, and sometimes a man will get tired of some of his wives, (when he has many) he will get rid of some of them. She also said that even if a woman thinks she is in a monogamous marriage, there is still a large chance that her husband is cheating on her. She told me that she would leave her husband immediately if he tried to get another wife, but since she is working in Gulu and he is working in Kampala, she just has to trust that he is staying faithful to her.
It has been interesting to study the dynamic in my host family because my dad has two wives. One of them is younger (31) and does not speak any English (I don’t know whether that indicates something about her education level because all of the children are taught English in school?) She seems kind of quiet and pretty subservient, and doesn’t seem to interact very much with the husband. The other wife is older (about his age), speaks English pretty well, and seems to have more power in terms of running the household. It’s hard for me to get a sense of the dynamic between the two women, but they seem to live together fine, eat together, and share a lot of the housework. I haven’t seen any animosity between the two women, but I’m not sure if they are particularly close either. One of my mothers explained to me that a big problem for women in Uganda is that they have to do all of the work in the household, while the man does nothing around the house. This means that the woman is constantly working, which is exhausting and can lead to major health problems. I think that this is a huge problem for women all over the world, and one of the first steps towards changing the status of women is to begin within the household. This is such a difficult process because it involves fighting long-standing norms and requires the cooperation of both the man and the women- the woman has to be strong about the role she wants in the relationship, and the man has to support that and take on an equal share of the work in the household. The structural changes need to be made to enable women to gain leadership positions and have equal opportunities and rights, but I do think that both here and at home, changes within the household would be a major first step.
In the few weeks I have been in Gulu, I have seen/heard of many instances of domestic violence. One night during dinner we heard a ton of children suddenly begin crying and yelling nearby. My mother and siblings all ran over to see what was happening, and it turned out that our neighbor’s husband had just gotten home drunk and was beating his wife in front of their children. My mother told me about it when she returned home, and it was really disturbing to me how commonplace this seemed. A few nights ago, there was a woman eating dinner with us who I had never seen before, and my mother told me that she is their niece, who had run away from her abusive husband. Both of her parents have passed away, so I think my family was her closest family, and so she had ridden on the back of pickup trucks and taken many different taxis to get to our house. She explained that this woman’s husband is very stubborn and beats her badly. She said that she will likely stay with us until her husband comes to get her. It is awful to think that this woman will probably have to go back to her abusive husband. Last night, the woman’s mother in law stayed at our house, apparently to speak with the woman and with my family about what they should do about the situation. Apparently the father-in-law will be coming to our house in the next few days, and then shortly after that the woman’s husband will come to work things out and bring her back with him. It is so interesting how involved the two families are in the relationship between this man and woman, and it was really interesting to sit in our kitchen hut eating dinner with my mother, this woman, and this woman’s abusive husband’s mother, an unusual combination! I wonder what the role of the mother-in-law is in this situation, and if she sides more with the woman or with her son.
I have heard really mixed opinions on the progress that has been made for women. Some people have made it sound like it is much better now, and other made it sound like there are still MAJOR problems. My guess is that both are true- it has gotten a lot better but there is still a LONG WAY to go. In order to change the situation, initiatives are going to have to be taken on several different levels- in government, through legal mechanisms, within the community, and on the family level, and target many different groups-men, women, government officials, villagers, etc. This is definitely not unique to Uganda however, I think initiatives like this need to take place in nearly all (if not all) parts of the world.
Saturday, March 27, 2010
Nakivale Refugee Settlement and first impressions of Gulu
On our way from Rwanda to Uganda, we stopped at a town in Southern Uganda called Mbarara to meet up with the other group for a couple of days. While we were there, we visited Nakivale Refugee Settlement. Nakivale is a refugee camp that was created in the 1950s and that houses thousands and thousands of refugees from about seven different countries. I wasn’t really sure what a refugee camp would look like, especially given the fact that it has been in existence for over 50 years. I was a little surprised to find that it pretty much looked like a town/village in the parts we were in. However, when I thought about it more, of course there is some infrastructure (people have been living there for so long) and I’m sure that there is MUCH MORE needed and lacking.
It was interesting to hear about how all of the different groups (from different countries) and how they live together in the camp. I wonder how the people regard the camp, and if the people who have lived there for their whole lives, or nearly their whole lives, identify more with Uganda and the camp, or with their home country. It is really strange to imagine not having a real place to call yours, because the country your family comes from in not home, but neither is the camp (or at least I imgaine.)
Our group broke into two, and half of us talked to Rwandan refugees while the other half spoke with Congolese refugees. I was in the group that spoke with the Rwandan refugees. I expected them to provide a different perspective than we had heard in Rwanda, but I did not expect it to be nearly as extreme as it was. The refugees we spoke to were nearly all (if not all) Hutu, and a couple of them told us that they had run away from the community service work camps or life imprisonment sentences. They began by saying that they should not have been given such long sentence and that the gacaca is biased and extended their sentences so that the Tutsi can take their land. While I really value hearing this perspective, they went on to suggest that they shouldn’t really have to serve time for their crimes, that far more Hutu than Tutsi were killed, and that the Tutsi are trying to make it sound much worse than it was. They were being completely disrespectful in the way that they spoke about the deaths of the Tutsi people and were spewing really extreme comments that went against everything we had learned in Rwanda. While it may be unfair to assume that everything they were telling us was outrageous and incorrect, they seemed to be using this information to justify their actions and legitimize their crimes. I think this experience was especially frustrating because of the strong connections I have made with genocide survivors. The words of these Hutu refugees seemed to still contain hate towards the Tutsi and did not seem to express any guilt or remorse for their crimes. It hit much closer to home, however, because it felt like the people they were talking about really are my friends and family. My host family fled Rwanda in 1959 because of violence against the Tutsis, and I became friends with several people whose entire families were killed in the genocide. Because of the connection I feel with people who have had to endure awful things in the genocide, it was especially painful to hear them denying and delegitimizing the pain and death. I had not realized that I felt so connected to the people I had met in Rwanda, but my gut reaction was to feel defensive of them when I heard this. It was interesting to see and acknowledge my own bias, to see how I have developed opinions and views about Rwanda, and to see myself have strong reactions in relation to them after just living there for one month. They also did tell us a lot about the problems they are facing as Hutu refugees and the problems that Hutus in Rwanda currently face, which made miss wish that I had heard this perspective while I was in Rwanda and could look into it further.
Another thing I couldn’t stop thinking about while I was at Nakivale was how this situation has the potential to lead to further conflict. These Rwandan refugees are overwhelmingly Hutu, which means that they are probably working each other up and possibly breeding more anger and hatred. While Hutus and Tutsis in Rwanda are reconciling and learning to live together again, these Hutu refugees are isolated, are being treated poorly in the camp because it is very difficult for them to get refugee status, and are likely getting more and more angry. I really hope that this won’t lead to more conflict in the future, but the current situation makes it seem like this could be a possibility. This was not something that I had really thought of, but our translator suggested that this was what he had predicted would happen. Rwanda has been peaceful for about 15 years now, but it is scary to think that the upcoming elections have the potential to cause major problems for the country.
I left that discussion even more unsure of what to believe because we have heard such opposing viewpoints on the same topics, but overall I think it was really valuable to hear the perspective of the Hutu refugees, and I think it was really important in order to gain a more comprehensive understanding of the situation in Rwanda.
We then parted ways with the other group, and took a five hour bus ride to Gulu in Northern Uganda. We arrived in Gulu in the evening, settled into our hostel, ate dinner, and went to sleep, so we didn’t see any of Gulu beyond our hotel. This made me really excited to wake up the next morning for our first real day of exploring and getting to know Gulu. We had our first Acholi class in the morning and it was nice to jump straight into the language so that we’d have some Acholi words to use on our first day. We then had a drop-off, where we split into groups and explored different aspects of Gulu like health, NGOs, media, entertainment, etc. Sophie, Rachel and I were assigned to scope out restaurants and the market, so we decided to get some food before we headed to the market. We tried to get lunch at a couple of places that serve Acholi food, but none of them were serving lunch yet, so we ended up at a place that serves both Acholi and more western food. We sat down and opened the menu, and I was excited to see that the money goes to an organization that helps returnees which is run by a woman that also works for Invisible Children and that I have met through IC events in the US! I was comforted by the familiarity and Gulu already began to feel smaller. We got our food and began to eat and it was SO GOOD! Then, five people with IC shirts walked in. I asked one of them if they work for IC, and he sat down next to me. He told me that he is an engineer for the Schools for Schools program. I told them that my partner school for S4S is Anaka Secondary, and he told me that he is one of the lead engineers for Anaka Secondary! I couldn’t believe it, my first day in Gulu and I had already met someone who was working on the school I raised money for! The other four people sat down and it was so exciting to talk about IC’s programs here, what they do, etc. It turns out we know a lot of the same people and it was so fun to have such an engaged conversation and really be able to relate when talking about projects that we have worked on. It was like two pieces of a puzzle (as cheesy as that sounds)- I had worked on these projects from the US, and they are implementing them here on the ground, and through talking about it, we could really put the pieces together to understand how they work as a whole. It was one of those exhilarating conversations where we were able to feed off of each other and connect over our shared interest and commitment to something. Sophie and Rachel commented afterward on how happy I seemed and it was true- I really was just so happy to be there lost in conversation with these IC employees!
Later that afternoon we moved in with our host families. My papa came to pick me up and brought me to our home in Pece (which is about a 40 minute walk from town.) My mama, grandmother, and sisters were all sitting in front of the house on grass mats, and they each shook hands with me and welcomed me. After I settled into my room, my 19-year-old sister Durcas took me on a brief tour of the area. We walked through a maze of grass huts, goats, chickens, ducks, dogs and children playing around in the afternoon sunshine. Women were sitting on grass mats outside of their houses cutting vegetables and socializing with the other women, while the occasional man whirred past on a bicycle. My sister brought me to the village market, which was filled with women selling fruits, vegetables, fish, and grains either from the ground or from or from wooden stands. We bought cabbage, tomatoes, ocra and fish to use as ingredients in the dinner we were soon to prepare.
We walked back to the house and sat down with the other women in the family. They showed me how to chop cabbage and alternated between laughing at my attempted and gasping when I nearly cut myself in the process. I eventually mastered the art of cabbage chopping, and began to chop them at almost the same pace as the other women. At the beginning my mama would give me a small piece to cut while she worked on a much larger piece. By the end, (it was a long process because we had several cabbages to cut into small pieces) she proudly handed me a large chunk of cabbage. You gotta enjoy the small accomplishments in life, right? :)
I helped my sister to cook the rest of the meal in the kitchen hut. Cooking a meal is such a different process here than in the US- instead of utilizing the convenience of a microwave or an electric stove in a kitchen with cabinets, counter space, and a fridge, we were cooking all of our food in one pot over a small charcoal stove in a grass hut. Dinner was also a very different process than it is in the US. My sister and I divided the food onto three large trays. We brought one tray to the group of women and children sitting on grass mats in the front yard, one tray to the men and boys sitting on plastic chairs a couple of feet away, and put one aside for my father for when he got home. My sister and I sat down with the other women, which consisted of my two mothers (yes, my father has two wives! More about that next time…), my grandmother, and a couple of children. My sister served the food for me onto a plate and then told me that I would learn how to eat with my hands. She laughed as I took my first few bites with my hands (it took a couple of days to get my hand-eating skills to meet her approval), and then the rest of the women began to eat out of the serving dishes. Several of the women only speak Acholi, so as they conversed in Acholi, I took the opportunity to soak up this place and situation-my new home- and fall into my own world of thought. Besides our house, I was pretty much surrounded by grass huts, each home to an Acholi family. The stars were like nothing I had seen before- the sky was literally COVERERED with little specs of light. Chickens and ducks waddled around, and the family cat wandered on and off our makeshift grass mat dinner table. I could hear a baby crying in the distance, and the sound of music coming out of a radio nearby. The balmy African air had cooled off since the afternoon, and the breeze was refreshing after a hot sweaty day. This world was very different from my world at home, and from the one I had become accustomed to in Rwanda, but I felt surprisingly at ease. The food was fresh, the sense of community was deeply present, and we were eating under a beautiful starry sky- at that moment I knew that even though there would be many challenges in adjusting to this new place and coping with the difficult subject matter (the war), I was ready for them, and ready to soak in this culture and lifestyle.
Sooooo umm that was two weeks ago! Haha, I thought I should talk about my first day in detail since it was really great, but now I’m behind on the last two weeks! Basically we have class Monday-Friday from about 9-3:30 or 4. After that we generally go into town to go to the market, grab a snack, use the internet or go to visit offices of NGOs. We left Gulu for three days and stayed about two and a half hours north in a town called Kitgum. One of the days we drove to Lukung, which is on the border of Uganda and Sudan, and conducted a conflict assessment in a former Internally Displaced Persons (IDP) camp. This basically consisted of breaking up into groups and speaking with different groups of people in the surrounding area about the conflicts that currently exist in the region, the problems they are facing, and what their lives are like. It was pretty intense, so I think I’ll talk about that more later. Other than that, we have visited another IDP camp, had all kinds of different lectures, gone swimming on the weekends, spoken with a lot of interesting people, and gotten to know Gulu a lot better. We live with our host families for another week and a couple of days, then we go to Kampala (the capital) for 4 days, and then we begin our Independent Study Projects!! SO CRAZYYY!! I miss you all so much and hope everyone is doing well!
It was interesting to hear about how all of the different groups (from different countries) and how they live together in the camp. I wonder how the people regard the camp, and if the people who have lived there for their whole lives, or nearly their whole lives, identify more with Uganda and the camp, or with their home country. It is really strange to imagine not having a real place to call yours, because the country your family comes from in not home, but neither is the camp (or at least I imgaine.)
Our group broke into two, and half of us talked to Rwandan refugees while the other half spoke with Congolese refugees. I was in the group that spoke with the Rwandan refugees. I expected them to provide a different perspective than we had heard in Rwanda, but I did not expect it to be nearly as extreme as it was. The refugees we spoke to were nearly all (if not all) Hutu, and a couple of them told us that they had run away from the community service work camps or life imprisonment sentences. They began by saying that they should not have been given such long sentence and that the gacaca is biased and extended their sentences so that the Tutsi can take their land. While I really value hearing this perspective, they went on to suggest that they shouldn’t really have to serve time for their crimes, that far more Hutu than Tutsi were killed, and that the Tutsi are trying to make it sound much worse than it was. They were being completely disrespectful in the way that they spoke about the deaths of the Tutsi people and were spewing really extreme comments that went against everything we had learned in Rwanda. While it may be unfair to assume that everything they were telling us was outrageous and incorrect, they seemed to be using this information to justify their actions and legitimize their crimes. I think this experience was especially frustrating because of the strong connections I have made with genocide survivors. The words of these Hutu refugees seemed to still contain hate towards the Tutsi and did not seem to express any guilt or remorse for their crimes. It hit much closer to home, however, because it felt like the people they were talking about really are my friends and family. My host family fled Rwanda in 1959 because of violence against the Tutsis, and I became friends with several people whose entire families were killed in the genocide. Because of the connection I feel with people who have had to endure awful things in the genocide, it was especially painful to hear them denying and delegitimizing the pain and death. I had not realized that I felt so connected to the people I had met in Rwanda, but my gut reaction was to feel defensive of them when I heard this. It was interesting to see and acknowledge my own bias, to see how I have developed opinions and views about Rwanda, and to see myself have strong reactions in relation to them after just living there for one month. They also did tell us a lot about the problems they are facing as Hutu refugees and the problems that Hutus in Rwanda currently face, which made miss wish that I had heard this perspective while I was in Rwanda and could look into it further.
Another thing I couldn’t stop thinking about while I was at Nakivale was how this situation has the potential to lead to further conflict. These Rwandan refugees are overwhelmingly Hutu, which means that they are probably working each other up and possibly breeding more anger and hatred. While Hutus and Tutsis in Rwanda are reconciling and learning to live together again, these Hutu refugees are isolated, are being treated poorly in the camp because it is very difficult for them to get refugee status, and are likely getting more and more angry. I really hope that this won’t lead to more conflict in the future, but the current situation makes it seem like this could be a possibility. This was not something that I had really thought of, but our translator suggested that this was what he had predicted would happen. Rwanda has been peaceful for about 15 years now, but it is scary to think that the upcoming elections have the potential to cause major problems for the country.
I left that discussion even more unsure of what to believe because we have heard such opposing viewpoints on the same topics, but overall I think it was really valuable to hear the perspective of the Hutu refugees, and I think it was really important in order to gain a more comprehensive understanding of the situation in Rwanda.
We then parted ways with the other group, and took a five hour bus ride to Gulu in Northern Uganda. We arrived in Gulu in the evening, settled into our hostel, ate dinner, and went to sleep, so we didn’t see any of Gulu beyond our hotel. This made me really excited to wake up the next morning for our first real day of exploring and getting to know Gulu. We had our first Acholi class in the morning and it was nice to jump straight into the language so that we’d have some Acholi words to use on our first day. We then had a drop-off, where we split into groups and explored different aspects of Gulu like health, NGOs, media, entertainment, etc. Sophie, Rachel and I were assigned to scope out restaurants and the market, so we decided to get some food before we headed to the market. We tried to get lunch at a couple of places that serve Acholi food, but none of them were serving lunch yet, so we ended up at a place that serves both Acholi and more western food. We sat down and opened the menu, and I was excited to see that the money goes to an organization that helps returnees which is run by a woman that also works for Invisible Children and that I have met through IC events in the US! I was comforted by the familiarity and Gulu already began to feel smaller. We got our food and began to eat and it was SO GOOD! Then, five people with IC shirts walked in. I asked one of them if they work for IC, and he sat down next to me. He told me that he is an engineer for the Schools for Schools program. I told them that my partner school for S4S is Anaka Secondary, and he told me that he is one of the lead engineers for Anaka Secondary! I couldn’t believe it, my first day in Gulu and I had already met someone who was working on the school I raised money for! The other four people sat down and it was so exciting to talk about IC’s programs here, what they do, etc. It turns out we know a lot of the same people and it was so fun to have such an engaged conversation and really be able to relate when talking about projects that we have worked on. It was like two pieces of a puzzle (as cheesy as that sounds)- I had worked on these projects from the US, and they are implementing them here on the ground, and through talking about it, we could really put the pieces together to understand how they work as a whole. It was one of those exhilarating conversations where we were able to feed off of each other and connect over our shared interest and commitment to something. Sophie and Rachel commented afterward on how happy I seemed and it was true- I really was just so happy to be there lost in conversation with these IC employees!
Later that afternoon we moved in with our host families. My papa came to pick me up and brought me to our home in Pece (which is about a 40 minute walk from town.) My mama, grandmother, and sisters were all sitting in front of the house on grass mats, and they each shook hands with me and welcomed me. After I settled into my room, my 19-year-old sister Durcas took me on a brief tour of the area. We walked through a maze of grass huts, goats, chickens, ducks, dogs and children playing around in the afternoon sunshine. Women were sitting on grass mats outside of their houses cutting vegetables and socializing with the other women, while the occasional man whirred past on a bicycle. My sister brought me to the village market, which was filled with women selling fruits, vegetables, fish, and grains either from the ground or from or from wooden stands. We bought cabbage, tomatoes, ocra and fish to use as ingredients in the dinner we were soon to prepare.
We walked back to the house and sat down with the other women in the family. They showed me how to chop cabbage and alternated between laughing at my attempted and gasping when I nearly cut myself in the process. I eventually mastered the art of cabbage chopping, and began to chop them at almost the same pace as the other women. At the beginning my mama would give me a small piece to cut while she worked on a much larger piece. By the end, (it was a long process because we had several cabbages to cut into small pieces) she proudly handed me a large chunk of cabbage. You gotta enjoy the small accomplishments in life, right? :)
I helped my sister to cook the rest of the meal in the kitchen hut. Cooking a meal is such a different process here than in the US- instead of utilizing the convenience of a microwave or an electric stove in a kitchen with cabinets, counter space, and a fridge, we were cooking all of our food in one pot over a small charcoal stove in a grass hut. Dinner was also a very different process than it is in the US. My sister and I divided the food onto three large trays. We brought one tray to the group of women and children sitting on grass mats in the front yard, one tray to the men and boys sitting on plastic chairs a couple of feet away, and put one aside for my father for when he got home. My sister and I sat down with the other women, which consisted of my two mothers (yes, my father has two wives! More about that next time…), my grandmother, and a couple of children. My sister served the food for me onto a plate and then told me that I would learn how to eat with my hands. She laughed as I took my first few bites with my hands (it took a couple of days to get my hand-eating skills to meet her approval), and then the rest of the women began to eat out of the serving dishes. Several of the women only speak Acholi, so as they conversed in Acholi, I took the opportunity to soak up this place and situation-my new home- and fall into my own world of thought. Besides our house, I was pretty much surrounded by grass huts, each home to an Acholi family. The stars were like nothing I had seen before- the sky was literally COVERERED with little specs of light. Chickens and ducks waddled around, and the family cat wandered on and off our makeshift grass mat dinner table. I could hear a baby crying in the distance, and the sound of music coming out of a radio nearby. The balmy African air had cooled off since the afternoon, and the breeze was refreshing after a hot sweaty day. This world was very different from my world at home, and from the one I had become accustomed to in Rwanda, but I felt surprisingly at ease. The food was fresh, the sense of community was deeply present, and we were eating under a beautiful starry sky- at that moment I knew that even though there would be many challenges in adjusting to this new place and coping with the difficult subject matter (the war), I was ready for them, and ready to soak in this culture and lifestyle.
Sooooo umm that was two weeks ago! Haha, I thought I should talk about my first day in detail since it was really great, but now I’m behind on the last two weeks! Basically we have class Monday-Friday from about 9-3:30 or 4. After that we generally go into town to go to the market, grab a snack, use the internet or go to visit offices of NGOs. We left Gulu for three days and stayed about two and a half hours north in a town called Kitgum. One of the days we drove to Lukung, which is on the border of Uganda and Sudan, and conducted a conflict assessment in a former Internally Displaced Persons (IDP) camp. This basically consisted of breaking up into groups and speaking with different groups of people in the surrounding area about the conflicts that currently exist in the region, the problems they are facing, and what their lives are like. It was pretty intense, so I think I’ll talk about that more later. Other than that, we have visited another IDP camp, had all kinds of different lectures, gone swimming on the weekends, spoken with a lot of interesting people, and gotten to know Gulu a lot better. We live with our host families for another week and a couple of days, then we go to Kampala (the capital) for 4 days, and then we begin our Independent Study Projects!! SO CRAZYYY!! I miss you all so much and hope everyone is doing well!
Wednesday, March 17, 2010
Saying goodbye to Rwanda
This week I said my good-byes to my Rwandan family and friends, my neighborhood and the places I have come to love in Kigali, and travelled back to Uganda. We drove to Mbarara in Southern Uganda and met the other group for a couple of days. The main thing we did there was visit Nakivale Refugee Settlement, where thousands of refugees from DRC, Rwanda, Somalia, Eritrea and Sudan are living. It was a very interesting experience, but more about that later.
In leaving Rwanda, I realize that so much has happened in the past 6 weeks that it would be impossible to capture it all. I cannot believe my time in Rwanda has come to an end. It came and went so quickly, with such a wide range of emotions- so many struggles, achievements, friendships made and an incredible amount of learning along the way. I initially chose this program for the Uganda portion, but Rwanda itself has already had such an affect on me. I could never have imagined that my stay in Rwanda would help me to better understand things like justice, forgiveness, the complexity of truth, the importance and power of a caring community, the ways two people can communicate when they speak different languages, the immense tragedy of death caused by hatred, the strength that humans have within themselves that helps them to survive and begin to heal from something as awful as genocide, the importance of hope for the future, the necessity of having faith in other people, how wonderful it is to laugh with and enjoy the company of new friends from another culture, and that bucket showers save A LOT of water. In many ways I feel like my time here has made me more confused about certain things my experiences so far have left me with more questions than answers, and I am excited to continue to search for answers to these questions during the rest of my time in Uganda, acknowledging and being ok with the fact that I won’t figure out the answers to all of them. Some questions I am currently thinking about are: What is and what should be the role of the international community in conflicts worldwide? What role does international aid play in developing communities- is it really helping or does it ultimately continue the cycle of poverty? If so, is there a way to change the structure so that this does not happen? What role do US interests play our involvement and policies towards African nations? How can we make our policies be less about our interests and more about the needs of the African people? What role can I and do I want to play in all of this? How can I make the largest, most sustainable and most responsible difference possible?
Though some may seem small, and some are larger, there are several moments that really stood out about my time in Rwanda for one reason or another. I’ll write about some of them here so that you can see some of the things I’ve been up to and what I’ve been thinking about.
On the last Saturday of each month, there is no school (yes, there is usually school on Saturday!), all shops, businesses, and offices are closed so that everyone has the morning off, and the public transportation system is not in operation. During this period of time, every Rwandan is supposed to take part in a community service project in his or her neighborhood, and then attend a neighborhood meeting. This is called Umuganda. I attended Umuganda with my 20-year-old sister. She said that because of the rain it would not be as big as usual. We walked out of our house, turned our corner, and immediately saw about 50 people shoveling and hacking at the road with hoes. My first impression was that they were nearly all men, I saw about five women. Everyone seemed a bit surprised to see me, but I smiled and gave my greetings to the group. My sister handed me a hoe and I raised it over my head and pummeled it into the ground, attempting to copy the skill of those around me. The entire group burst out laughing at my attempt. One guy, who looked like he was in his early 20’s decided to make me his pet project, and spent a good 15 minutes trying to teach me how to do it properly (it is much more difficult than it looks!) I’m not sure that I ever got it perfectly to his satisfaction, but I eventually got the basic hang of it.
As soon as I heard about Umuganda, I though it was such a great idea. I am often frustrated and disappointed by the lack of dedication to service in the US. Don’t get me wrong, many people volunteer massive amounts of their time in the US, but there are also a large group of people who do not even consider doing so. To set aside one morning per month to spend time together bettering the community seems like such a nice concept. The only thing vaguely like this on a large level in the US is the National Day of Service on September 11th, which encourages the public to take part in some type of community service project on 9/11 of each year. Many people participate in this, but many people also do not. Because Umuganda is done by neighborhood, it serves to bring the community together in addition to its purpose to improve the physical conditions of the area. As I was participating in Umuganda, I saw the people around me talking as they worked. By bring people together in this way, the neighborhood is bound to get closer. I think that neighborhoods are already much closer here than they are in most parts of the US, but umuganda only serves to strengthen this sense of community. It is powerful to see neighbors coming together to better their community, when one of the most disturbing parts of the genocide was the way that neighbors turned on one another.
I was a little disappointed to see that many people do not attend Umuganda, and instead use the time to clean the house, catch up on rest, etc. My sister said that my papa usually comes but that he had not come today because he was exhausted from just coming back from Kampala. When I asked about mama, my sister said that most women do not come because they don’t like the physical labor. When she told me this as we were shoveling the road, I worried that this meant that the women also do not attend the community meeting after the project, and therefore do not participate in community discussions and decisions. This assumption turned out to be wrong, many women turned up for the meeting, and they participated heavily.
The community meeting struck me as incredible and like nothing I had seen before. My sister’s best friend, Ricky, sat next to me and translated what was going on for me. The meeting was run by the village chief. He made announcements about different things going on in the village (they call the various neighborhoods outside the main part of town “villages”), like various meetings and projects. He also thanked everyone who participated in Umuganda, stressing the importance of working together to improve the community, and asked everyone to encourage the people who were not present to come next time. He then asked if anyone had problems they wanted to discuss. One man brought up the fact that every time it rains heavily, his house gets flooded with water. Many people also shared that they were also having this problem, and that it was damaging for their house and personal items. Many people took turns talking, and they ultimately decided that they need to dig more ditches on the side of the road for the water to go into. Someone pointed out that it is very important that people take responsibility and actually dig the ditch in front of their house, because each person will has to pay the consequences if they do not. After this discussion, a woman stood up and told the community about the particularly difficult situation she is currently in. Her husband is in the hospital with a heart condition and she cannot pay the medical bills for his treatment. He is not doing well, and the doctor has pretty much given up on him. She does not own her house (she is renting it), but she doesn’t have the money to pay the rent. Also, her children have not been in school for four months because she cannot pay the fees. Everyone at this meeting then began discussing this woman’s situation and what they should do to help her. Someone suggested taking the community dues that they pay and giving some of it to her to help her pay the hospital bills, the rent or the school fees. Someone else said that this was not a sustainable solution; they could pay a few months of this lady’s rent, but then what? Someone else said that he thought she might be lying about the hospital bills and that she had actually already paid them. One man then said that he is the director of the local primary school, and that he could help her get her kids into school without paying the fees until she is in a better financial situation. The woman then mentioned that she is from Burundi. Someone asked her if she has land there, and she said that she does. They then discussed paying the transportation costs for her and her children to go back to Burundi, because then at least she would have a place to live and land to farm. After much discussion, I think they decided to help her with her rent for a couple of months and then go from there.
There were several things that struck me about what I had just seen. First, about 50 people were sitting around talking about this lady’s problems. This would NEVER happen in the US because most people are ashamed of their problems and try to hide them from the people around them, often especially their neighbors! I asked Ricky if he thought she minded that all of these people were talking about her problems, but he said that she did not mind and that it was in fact good for her, because she now had the support of the community. He also said something along the lines of, “Why would she want to keep it private? That would do her no good.” I then wondered if people ever take advantage of this opportunity for support when they don’t really need it. Ricky said that this doesn’t happen, because then people would not help them when a time came where they really needed it. The other main thing that struck me was the fact that all of these people took the time to sit around for probably around 45 minutes and try to come up with solutions for this woman on a Saturday afternoon. I feel like some people in the US complain about having to sit and listen to a good friend talk about their problems for this amount of time. I really appreciate the fact that people are really dedicated to the community and the people in it, and they take the time and energy to really try to help each other. From my experiences with Umuganda and the community meeting, I think we have a lot to learn from the Rwandese people.
Another thing that stands out from my time in Rwanda was hearing the personal stories of people who have survived the genocide. Towards the end of our time there, one of our program staff gave us his testimony. We had heard many other people’s stories, but none had hit me in the way that his did. We had spent the last month with him, sharing meals, funny stories, and getting to know each other as people. I had gotten to know him more as a really person than as a survivor first, and so hearing his story hit much closer to home. When he told us that the UN soldiers who were guarding the school that him and his family were in locked them in the school and basically left them to die, my stomach dropped. He then continued to say that many of his family members were killed at this school- just a half a mile from UN headquarters. WHAT?? What is the point of the UN if they are not going to come through for people in times of great need, when people’s lives are literally in immediate danger? This must feel like such a betrayal; you go to a place tat is supposed to be safe because the UN is protecting it, and then most of your family members are killed because your “protectors” leave?! I know it is much more complicated than this and it is possible that they had to leave because their lives would also be in danger, and that the UN has done good in Rwanda since then genocide, but it is just so hard to hear a story like this. It is so incredible to see how people like him have gone on to dedicate their lives to memorializing the genocide and preventing further genocides, and I respect him so much for being willing to share his story.
On a lighter note, another really memorable experience was taking a boat to Bat Island with my group while we were staying at Lake Kivu. Lake Kivu is on the border of Rwanda and DRC and it is BEAUTIFUL! All 13 of us piled onto a motorboat. It was about a half hour ride to the island and it was absolutely gorgeous. As cheesy as it sounds, the cool breeze was so refreshing, and I couldn’t stop starring at the seemingly unreal teal color of the water. We got to the little island and piled out of the boat. It seriously felt like we were on survivor- the island seemed solely inhabited with wildlife. We were told that the bats come out at dusk and dawn, but we were there in the middle of the day, so we didn’t really expect to see them. However, as we began to walk on the island, the bats began flying out of the trees by the hundred, and soon the sky was COVERED with bats. It was like Hitchcock’s The Bird’s: Part II. SO SCARY. After a few encounters with undesirable bat poop, we decided that a few too many bats had appeared out of nowhere, and we were ready to get out of there. We immediately dove into the teal water, right off the island. Swimming in that water surrounded only by the sky, a tree (and bat)-filled island, and more water was so relaxing, and it was so nice to share this moment with my group, who have really become great friends of mine.
This is super random, but this experience also stood out to me as a special moment. One night, after I had gone out to dinner with a group of friends, I took a private taxi back to my house. This was the first time I was taking one (I usually use the public transportation system but that does not run late at night), so I was surprised to find out that the taxi would not take me all the way to my house because the driver said his car could not handle the bad dirt road. I had no idea what to do- it was about 12:30 AM at that point and I did not feel comfortable making the walk on the long, dark road by myself. Suddenly, my friend who was in the taxi with me because she was going to continue taking it to her house yelled, “Look! Two girls, go with them!!” The two girls looked about my age, and I ran up to them. I introduced myself in Kinyerwanda and they introduced themselves to me. The three of us began to walk in the same direction and then one of the girls turned down another road to go home. The road was pretty muddy, so my new friend grabbed my hand to help me navigate the path. I quickly realized that she didn’t speak English, so I asked her in Kinyerwanda how old she is. We were both very excited to find that we are both 20. We couldn’t really communicate much more than that, so we just held hands and laughed all the way to my house. It was as if we were young schoolgirls coming home from class, except that it was dark instead of light, and our main source of communication was laughter. We said goodbye outside my house and then she continued down the path to her house. I never saw her again after that, but it struck me as such a special chance meeting of two 20-year-old girls of two cultures with two difference languages who had found comfort in each other on their walk home one night.
In leaving Rwanda, I realize that so much has happened in the past 6 weeks that it would be impossible to capture it all. I cannot believe my time in Rwanda has come to an end. It came and went so quickly, with such a wide range of emotions- so many struggles, achievements, friendships made and an incredible amount of learning along the way. I initially chose this program for the Uganda portion, but Rwanda itself has already had such an affect on me. I could never have imagined that my stay in Rwanda would help me to better understand things like justice, forgiveness, the complexity of truth, the importance and power of a caring community, the ways two people can communicate when they speak different languages, the immense tragedy of death caused by hatred, the strength that humans have within themselves that helps them to survive and begin to heal from something as awful as genocide, the importance of hope for the future, the necessity of having faith in other people, how wonderful it is to laugh with and enjoy the company of new friends from another culture, and that bucket showers save A LOT of water. In many ways I feel like my time here has made me more confused about certain things my experiences so far have left me with more questions than answers, and I am excited to continue to search for answers to these questions during the rest of my time in Uganda, acknowledging and being ok with the fact that I won’t figure out the answers to all of them. Some questions I am currently thinking about are: What is and what should be the role of the international community in conflicts worldwide? What role does international aid play in developing communities- is it really helping or does it ultimately continue the cycle of poverty? If so, is there a way to change the structure so that this does not happen? What role do US interests play our involvement and policies towards African nations? How can we make our policies be less about our interests and more about the needs of the African people? What role can I and do I want to play in all of this? How can I make the largest, most sustainable and most responsible difference possible?
Though some may seem small, and some are larger, there are several moments that really stood out about my time in Rwanda for one reason or another. I’ll write about some of them here so that you can see some of the things I’ve been up to and what I’ve been thinking about.
On the last Saturday of each month, there is no school (yes, there is usually school on Saturday!), all shops, businesses, and offices are closed so that everyone has the morning off, and the public transportation system is not in operation. During this period of time, every Rwandan is supposed to take part in a community service project in his or her neighborhood, and then attend a neighborhood meeting. This is called Umuganda. I attended Umuganda with my 20-year-old sister. She said that because of the rain it would not be as big as usual. We walked out of our house, turned our corner, and immediately saw about 50 people shoveling and hacking at the road with hoes. My first impression was that they were nearly all men, I saw about five women. Everyone seemed a bit surprised to see me, but I smiled and gave my greetings to the group. My sister handed me a hoe and I raised it over my head and pummeled it into the ground, attempting to copy the skill of those around me. The entire group burst out laughing at my attempt. One guy, who looked like he was in his early 20’s decided to make me his pet project, and spent a good 15 minutes trying to teach me how to do it properly (it is much more difficult than it looks!) I’m not sure that I ever got it perfectly to his satisfaction, but I eventually got the basic hang of it.
As soon as I heard about Umuganda, I though it was such a great idea. I am often frustrated and disappointed by the lack of dedication to service in the US. Don’t get me wrong, many people volunteer massive amounts of their time in the US, but there are also a large group of people who do not even consider doing so. To set aside one morning per month to spend time together bettering the community seems like such a nice concept. The only thing vaguely like this on a large level in the US is the National Day of Service on September 11th, which encourages the public to take part in some type of community service project on 9/11 of each year. Many people participate in this, but many people also do not. Because Umuganda is done by neighborhood, it serves to bring the community together in addition to its purpose to improve the physical conditions of the area. As I was participating in Umuganda, I saw the people around me talking as they worked. By bring people together in this way, the neighborhood is bound to get closer. I think that neighborhoods are already much closer here than they are in most parts of the US, but umuganda only serves to strengthen this sense of community. It is powerful to see neighbors coming together to better their community, when one of the most disturbing parts of the genocide was the way that neighbors turned on one another.
I was a little disappointed to see that many people do not attend Umuganda, and instead use the time to clean the house, catch up on rest, etc. My sister said that my papa usually comes but that he had not come today because he was exhausted from just coming back from Kampala. When I asked about mama, my sister said that most women do not come because they don’t like the physical labor. When she told me this as we were shoveling the road, I worried that this meant that the women also do not attend the community meeting after the project, and therefore do not participate in community discussions and decisions. This assumption turned out to be wrong, many women turned up for the meeting, and they participated heavily.
The community meeting struck me as incredible and like nothing I had seen before. My sister’s best friend, Ricky, sat next to me and translated what was going on for me. The meeting was run by the village chief. He made announcements about different things going on in the village (they call the various neighborhoods outside the main part of town “villages”), like various meetings and projects. He also thanked everyone who participated in Umuganda, stressing the importance of working together to improve the community, and asked everyone to encourage the people who were not present to come next time. He then asked if anyone had problems they wanted to discuss. One man brought up the fact that every time it rains heavily, his house gets flooded with water. Many people also shared that they were also having this problem, and that it was damaging for their house and personal items. Many people took turns talking, and they ultimately decided that they need to dig more ditches on the side of the road for the water to go into. Someone pointed out that it is very important that people take responsibility and actually dig the ditch in front of their house, because each person will has to pay the consequences if they do not. After this discussion, a woman stood up and told the community about the particularly difficult situation she is currently in. Her husband is in the hospital with a heart condition and she cannot pay the medical bills for his treatment. He is not doing well, and the doctor has pretty much given up on him. She does not own her house (she is renting it), but she doesn’t have the money to pay the rent. Also, her children have not been in school for four months because she cannot pay the fees. Everyone at this meeting then began discussing this woman’s situation and what they should do to help her. Someone suggested taking the community dues that they pay and giving some of it to her to help her pay the hospital bills, the rent or the school fees. Someone else said that this was not a sustainable solution; they could pay a few months of this lady’s rent, but then what? Someone else said that he thought she might be lying about the hospital bills and that she had actually already paid them. One man then said that he is the director of the local primary school, and that he could help her get her kids into school without paying the fees until she is in a better financial situation. The woman then mentioned that she is from Burundi. Someone asked her if she has land there, and she said that she does. They then discussed paying the transportation costs for her and her children to go back to Burundi, because then at least she would have a place to live and land to farm. After much discussion, I think they decided to help her with her rent for a couple of months and then go from there.
There were several things that struck me about what I had just seen. First, about 50 people were sitting around talking about this lady’s problems. This would NEVER happen in the US because most people are ashamed of their problems and try to hide them from the people around them, often especially their neighbors! I asked Ricky if he thought she minded that all of these people were talking about her problems, but he said that she did not mind and that it was in fact good for her, because she now had the support of the community. He also said something along the lines of, “Why would she want to keep it private? That would do her no good.” I then wondered if people ever take advantage of this opportunity for support when they don’t really need it. Ricky said that this doesn’t happen, because then people would not help them when a time came where they really needed it. The other main thing that struck me was the fact that all of these people took the time to sit around for probably around 45 minutes and try to come up with solutions for this woman on a Saturday afternoon. I feel like some people in the US complain about having to sit and listen to a good friend talk about their problems for this amount of time. I really appreciate the fact that people are really dedicated to the community and the people in it, and they take the time and energy to really try to help each other. From my experiences with Umuganda and the community meeting, I think we have a lot to learn from the Rwandese people.
Another thing that stands out from my time in Rwanda was hearing the personal stories of people who have survived the genocide. Towards the end of our time there, one of our program staff gave us his testimony. We had heard many other people’s stories, but none had hit me in the way that his did. We had spent the last month with him, sharing meals, funny stories, and getting to know each other as people. I had gotten to know him more as a really person than as a survivor first, and so hearing his story hit much closer to home. When he told us that the UN soldiers who were guarding the school that him and his family were in locked them in the school and basically left them to die, my stomach dropped. He then continued to say that many of his family members were killed at this school- just a half a mile from UN headquarters. WHAT?? What is the point of the UN if they are not going to come through for people in times of great need, when people’s lives are literally in immediate danger? This must feel like such a betrayal; you go to a place tat is supposed to be safe because the UN is protecting it, and then most of your family members are killed because your “protectors” leave?! I know it is much more complicated than this and it is possible that they had to leave because their lives would also be in danger, and that the UN has done good in Rwanda since then genocide, but it is just so hard to hear a story like this. It is so incredible to see how people like him have gone on to dedicate their lives to memorializing the genocide and preventing further genocides, and I respect him so much for being willing to share his story.
On a lighter note, another really memorable experience was taking a boat to Bat Island with my group while we were staying at Lake Kivu. Lake Kivu is on the border of Rwanda and DRC and it is BEAUTIFUL! All 13 of us piled onto a motorboat. It was about a half hour ride to the island and it was absolutely gorgeous. As cheesy as it sounds, the cool breeze was so refreshing, and I couldn’t stop starring at the seemingly unreal teal color of the water. We got to the little island and piled out of the boat. It seriously felt like we were on survivor- the island seemed solely inhabited with wildlife. We were told that the bats come out at dusk and dawn, but we were there in the middle of the day, so we didn’t really expect to see them. However, as we began to walk on the island, the bats began flying out of the trees by the hundred, and soon the sky was COVERED with bats. It was like Hitchcock’s The Bird’s: Part II. SO SCARY. After a few encounters with undesirable bat poop, we decided that a few too many bats had appeared out of nowhere, and we were ready to get out of there. We immediately dove into the teal water, right off the island. Swimming in that water surrounded only by the sky, a tree (and bat)-filled island, and more water was so relaxing, and it was so nice to share this moment with my group, who have really become great friends of mine.
This is super random, but this experience also stood out to me as a special moment. One night, after I had gone out to dinner with a group of friends, I took a private taxi back to my house. This was the first time I was taking one (I usually use the public transportation system but that does not run late at night), so I was surprised to find out that the taxi would not take me all the way to my house because the driver said his car could not handle the bad dirt road. I had no idea what to do- it was about 12:30 AM at that point and I did not feel comfortable making the walk on the long, dark road by myself. Suddenly, my friend who was in the taxi with me because she was going to continue taking it to her house yelled, “Look! Two girls, go with them!!” The two girls looked about my age, and I ran up to them. I introduced myself in Kinyerwanda and they introduced themselves to me. The three of us began to walk in the same direction and then one of the girls turned down another road to go home. The road was pretty muddy, so my new friend grabbed my hand to help me navigate the path. I quickly realized that she didn’t speak English, so I asked her in Kinyerwanda how old she is. We were both very excited to find that we are both 20. We couldn’t really communicate much more than that, so we just held hands and laughed all the way to my house. It was as if we were young schoolgirls coming home from class, except that it was dark instead of light, and our main source of communication was laughter. We said goodbye outside my house and then she continued down the path to her house. I never saw her again after that, but it struck me as such a special chance meeting of two 20-year-old girls of two cultures with two difference languages who had found comfort in each other on their walk home one night.
Sunday, March 7, 2010
Pictures...
Our group on the equator!!
At the bottom of Mt. Bisoke
Soooo beautiful!
My host brother and grandmother
Some of my brothers and sisters
They loved the bubbles I brought!
Learning how to make a traditional Rwandan basket at a women's cooperative in the Millennium Village in Rwanda
This country is so unbelievably beautiful!
Sunset over Lake Kivu on the border of Rwanda and DRC
We took a boat to bat island, there are 5 million bats living there!!
On our boat ride
Paradise!
At the bottom of Mt. Bisoke
Soooo beautiful!
My host brother and grandmother
Some of my brothers and sisters
They loved the bubbles I brought!
Learning how to make a traditional Rwandan basket at a women's cooperative in the Millennium Village in Rwanda
This country is so unbelievably beautiful!
Sunset over Lake Kivu on the border of Rwanda and DRC
We took a boat to bat island, there are 5 million bats living there!!
On our boat ride
Paradise!
Wednesday, February 24, 2010
Women's Association and Bisoke!
While we were in Butare last week we visited this women's association that was in a small village up in the mountains. The road was AWFUL and small, and if you looked out the window you could see that there was nothing separating us from falling off the side of this cliff, and believe me, we were really high up! It was also raining, which made the muddy road even more difficult to drive on, so were were all kind of freaking out in this van that was literally hopping up and down because of the rocks in the road on the side of a mountain (while the guy driving us kept looking back at us and laughing instead of looking at the road!) Ok, it wasn't that bad, but definitely slightly scary! Anyway, we got to this village and filed into a room that was filled with rows of wooden benches. Several women were in the room vigorously stirring some yellow-ish looking liquid in an enormous bucket. We later learned that they were making soap to sell as an income generating activity. This women's association was formed organically after the genocide. There was a priest and a nun in this area that were working with a group of Tutsi women whose husband's had been killed during the genocide one day per week, and working with a group of Hutu women whose husbands where in jail as perpetrators of the genocide another day per week. The group of survivors told the priest that they wanted to see what he was teaching the other group of women. The wives of the perpetrators came to a meeting of the survivors, and then returned to a second meeting. At the second meeting, the wives of the perpetrators asked for forgiveness, which the survivors accepted. The two groups of women began living and working together, realizing that they were more alike than they thought. Though the circumstances and reasons were different, each group of women did not have their husbands, were raising their families by themselves, and were suffering from trauma in some form or another. They have been working on unity and reconciliation, and have become a force for promoting peace and reconciliation among their community. During our discussion, one of the women said,
"We lost so much human capital that all we want now is to be human beings and to share what we have to help each other. We don't care anymore about what happened, we now want to move on together."
I thought it was incredible to see how this group of women has come together to help and support each other, when so many things have happened in the past that would keep them apart, and even make them enemies. The women explained that it has been a long process and at times has been very difficult, but that it has really helped them to reconcile and form personal relationships with each other. I asked them whether their identity is more tied to the actions/outcomes of their husbands, or their shared female identity, and it was interesting to see how matter-of-fact their answers were. I'm not sure they have the same conception of "identity" as we do, and though I'm sure identity plays a role in their lives (especially because so much of the genocide and post-genocide discussions have to do with identity), it was not something they were interested in talking about in a theoretical way. They are all women who have endured very difficult circumstances and have now come together to support each other and bring a polarized community together, that is what matters, not "which part of their identity is more salient." I still do think it is interesting to think about, however, because i wonder if they truly do look at themselves as one group now, or if the past divisions still play a role in the association and in their lives. I think they have done incredible work so far, and it was really inspiring to see their desire to move forward and reconcile overpower the past animosity and problems, to create a unified group who is working together to promote peace. As we were about to leave, the women began singing and dancing so beautifully, pulling us in to join them. Unfortunately we couldn't stay and dance for long because it was beginning to rain harder and our academic director was worried that our van would get stuck in the mud on the mountain road if we didn't leave soon, but it was so wonderful to see the joy and smiles that they emanated as they were dancing, despite all of the hardships they have had to face.
This weekend, three other girls in my program and I decided to go climb a volcano in Volcanoes National Park. After class on Friday, we hopped on a two hour bus to the town of Rhengueri. We got there at about 7pm and found a hostel that had been recommended in the guidebook. The hostel is a restaurant, a bar, and a hostel, so the man led us through this 4 and a half foot tiny door (kinda like a hobit hole?), through this tunnel type thing that consisted of a sheet of metal separating the room from the restaurant, to our cozy toilet-smelling home for the weekend. It had a flushing toilet and and running water though, so we were happy as ever! The four of us shared two little twin beds, which had toy story and alphabet sheets on them. We went to a couple of little shops to get food for our hike the next day (a loaf of bread, peanut butter, chocolate spread, bananas, apples and peanuts) and then got dinner down at a restaurant down the street (a heaping plate of rice, beans, plain spaghetti, and potatoes for the equivalent of a dollar!)
My friend Chiara wrote about our hike on her blog, and since I don't have a lot of time to write it all out and i think she described it perfectly, I'll copy and paste hers and then add some more of my own comments!
"We started out walking through beautiful tea fields that went on an on until they hit the sides of a series of volcanoes far off in the distance. We reached the edge of the park and climbed over a short wall into what seemed like a jungle. The path we were walking along was narrow and extremely muddy because it had rained the night before. Initially. we were trying to hop around and over the mud puddles to keep clean, but as we went on it started to rain and the mud got worse and worse to the point where every step you took you were slipping and sliding and hoping you wouldn't face plant into the mud or the stinging nettles that bordered the path. It was exhausting because not only were you trying to scale 1000 meters up a volcano, but you also had to un-suction your feet from the mud as you went and pull yourself over particularly slippery parts using tree branches, vines, and our walking sticks. Lets just say that it may have been the most intense full body work-out that I've ever done. But it was beautiful, the surrounding jungle was gorgeous and at one point we had to make a detour off the path straight into the bushes because a pack of Gorillas had decided to use the path we were on. It was soo cool getting to see the huge animals, even if it was just for a second because one of our armed guards carrying an AK-47 was ushering us forward. I forgot to mention that we had two armed guards with guns accompanying us on our hike...reassuring? The volcano is actually directly on the boarder with the DRC. When we reached the top and look out over the crater lake we could see the DRC, they suspect that armed militia may be in the bush there, not to mention Gorilla poachers and the likes. The way down the mountain was extremely messy because it had rained for a good 2 hours of our hike up. We basically slide down the 1000 meters on our butts. Needless to say I was covered in mud, you couldn't even tell I was wearing shoes anymore. For some time I slide with an entire plant stuck into the mud that was caked onto my shoes. I wont lie, it got pretty old after a while. We were all really excited to get back to our room that smelled like toilet and take freezing cold bucket showers."
It was quite an experience! The hike was soooo unbelievably beautiful, and it was incredible to see the gorillas! People pay $500 to go gorilla trekking, and we just ran into them on our hike!! Our group was awesome and consisted of the four of us, a South African couple, 3 Rwandan porters and two armed guards. It was so exciting to get to the top of the volcano, it felt like we were on the top of the world! Going down the mountain was REALLY scary because we were slipping and sliding all over the place, but one of the porters was sooo helpful and pretty much held my hand down the mountain. It was half hilarious half terrifying, but I'd definitely say the hilarious end outweighed the terrifying part! It was an incredible experience!
Some of the women from the women's association
The volcano we climbed!
The gorilla we saw!
This is our "just conquered the mountain" pose!
"We lost so much human capital that all we want now is to be human beings and to share what we have to help each other. We don't care anymore about what happened, we now want to move on together."
I thought it was incredible to see how this group of women has come together to help and support each other, when so many things have happened in the past that would keep them apart, and even make them enemies. The women explained that it has been a long process and at times has been very difficult, but that it has really helped them to reconcile and form personal relationships with each other. I asked them whether their identity is more tied to the actions/outcomes of their husbands, or their shared female identity, and it was interesting to see how matter-of-fact their answers were. I'm not sure they have the same conception of "identity" as we do, and though I'm sure identity plays a role in their lives (especially because so much of the genocide and post-genocide discussions have to do with identity), it was not something they were interested in talking about in a theoretical way. They are all women who have endured very difficult circumstances and have now come together to support each other and bring a polarized community together, that is what matters, not "which part of their identity is more salient." I still do think it is interesting to think about, however, because i wonder if they truly do look at themselves as one group now, or if the past divisions still play a role in the association and in their lives. I think they have done incredible work so far, and it was really inspiring to see their desire to move forward and reconcile overpower the past animosity and problems, to create a unified group who is working together to promote peace. As we were about to leave, the women began singing and dancing so beautifully, pulling us in to join them. Unfortunately we couldn't stay and dance for long because it was beginning to rain harder and our academic director was worried that our van would get stuck in the mud on the mountain road if we didn't leave soon, but it was so wonderful to see the joy and smiles that they emanated as they were dancing, despite all of the hardships they have had to face.
This weekend, three other girls in my program and I decided to go climb a volcano in Volcanoes National Park. After class on Friday, we hopped on a two hour bus to the town of Rhengueri. We got there at about 7pm and found a hostel that had been recommended in the guidebook. The hostel is a restaurant, a bar, and a hostel, so the man led us through this 4 and a half foot tiny door (kinda like a hobit hole?), through this tunnel type thing that consisted of a sheet of metal separating the room from the restaurant, to our cozy toilet-smelling home for the weekend. It had a flushing toilet and and running water though, so we were happy as ever! The four of us shared two little twin beds, which had toy story and alphabet sheets on them. We went to a couple of little shops to get food for our hike the next day (a loaf of bread, peanut butter, chocolate spread, bananas, apples and peanuts) and then got dinner down at a restaurant down the street (a heaping plate of rice, beans, plain spaghetti, and potatoes for the equivalent of a dollar!)
My friend Chiara wrote about our hike on her blog, and since I don't have a lot of time to write it all out and i think she described it perfectly, I'll copy and paste hers and then add some more of my own comments!
"We started out walking through beautiful tea fields that went on an on until they hit the sides of a series of volcanoes far off in the distance. We reached the edge of the park and climbed over a short wall into what seemed like a jungle. The path we were walking along was narrow and extremely muddy because it had rained the night before. Initially. we were trying to hop around and over the mud puddles to keep clean, but as we went on it started to rain and the mud got worse and worse to the point where every step you took you were slipping and sliding and hoping you wouldn't face plant into the mud or the stinging nettles that bordered the path. It was exhausting because not only were you trying to scale 1000 meters up a volcano, but you also had to un-suction your feet from the mud as you went and pull yourself over particularly slippery parts using tree branches, vines, and our walking sticks. Lets just say that it may have been the most intense full body work-out that I've ever done. But it was beautiful, the surrounding jungle was gorgeous and at one point we had to make a detour off the path straight into the bushes because a pack of Gorillas had decided to use the path we were on. It was soo cool getting to see the huge animals, even if it was just for a second because one of our armed guards carrying an AK-47 was ushering us forward. I forgot to mention that we had two armed guards with guns accompanying us on our hike...reassuring? The volcano is actually directly on the boarder with the DRC. When we reached the top and look out over the crater lake we could see the DRC, they suspect that armed militia may be in the bush there, not to mention Gorilla poachers and the likes. The way down the mountain was extremely messy because it had rained for a good 2 hours of our hike up. We basically slide down the 1000 meters on our butts. Needless to say I was covered in mud, you couldn't even tell I was wearing shoes anymore. For some time I slide with an entire plant stuck into the mud that was caked onto my shoes. I wont lie, it got pretty old after a while. We were all really excited to get back to our room that smelled like toilet and take freezing cold bucket showers."
It was quite an experience! The hike was soooo unbelievably beautiful, and it was incredible to see the gorillas! People pay $500 to go gorilla trekking, and we just ran into them on our hike!! Our group was awesome and consisted of the four of us, a South African couple, 3 Rwandan porters and two armed guards. It was so exciting to get to the top of the volcano, it felt like we were on the top of the world! Going down the mountain was REALLY scary because we were slipping and sliding all over the place, but one of the porters was sooo helpful and pretty much held my hand down the mountain. It was half hilarious half terrifying, but I'd definitely say the hilarious end outweighed the terrifying part! It was an incredible experience!
Some of the women from the women's association
The volcano we climbed!
The gorilla we saw!
This is our "just conquered the mountain" pose!
Sunday, February 21, 2010
The past two weeks
Last weekend was my first full weekend with my host family. On Saturday morning, two of my host sisters and the woman who works for the family and I went to the neighborhood outdoor market. There were people selling all kinds of different wares and it was divided into different sections based on the different products. There was the clothes section which consists mostly of used clothes from Western countries, there was the meats section (I avoided that...), the fruits and vegetables, the housewares, and so on. It was a whole morning affair to go to the market and shop for the food for the week, very different from the in and out mentality of a trip to the supermarket at home. My sisters would see people they know and catch up, greet community members, and bargain on the prices for each item. In most situations here bargaining is expected and is a friendly social practice. There is this green leafy vegetable that is boiled when it is prepared (it tastes like steamed spinach)that is very popular here. We bought some at the market, and waited for an hour while the woman ground it with an enormous mortar type thing. I couldn't help thinking that people in the US would never be patient enough to wait for this! I appreciated the fact that it felt more community-based, like the community came together to buy from each other, sell their products and for some people, to catch up on the week's events. At the same time, however, it did not seem like the care-free attitude of a farmers market at home. It was very hot out, and there was almost a sense of desperation and urgency. You could really tell that people's livelihoods depended on selling these goods, and there were young children weaving through the people with various types of fruits and vegetables on their heads, also trying to make a living. My host sister told me that orphans often start working from a very young age in order to make money to live.
On Sunday, my family took me to church with them. It was an enormous room that looked like a big gym or community center, with very little indication that it was in fact a church. The service was conducted both in Kinyerwanda and Swahili, with two people leading the service in two languages at the exact same time. I was definitely a little confused about what was going on at first! A couple of minutes into the service a man came and motioned for me to follow him. He took me to the side of the front of the church, where two chairs were sitting side by side. Another man came and sat down beside me and told me that he was the translator. He sat next to me for the entire three hour and 15 minute service, translating everything into English. The songs were beautiful, and it was clear that the service was affecting many of the congregants strongly, as some started crying or were singing with looks of pain, anguish, or hope on their faces during the different songs. Religion is a very big part of life here and has played a very interesting part both in the genocide and in reconciliation efforts, but i will write more about that when i have more time.
Last week, my group spent the first three days in a city in Southern Rwanda called Butare. We were staying on the campus of the National University of Rwanda. On the way to Butare, we stopped at the Murambi Genocide Memorial. Before the genocide, they were building a vocational school on this hilltop. When the genocide began, messages spread on the radio told Tutsi to go to the school to seek refuge. It was all a trap, however, because one day in April in 1994, Hutu militia came to kill everyone that was hiding there. About 50,000 people were killed, and only four people survived. After the massacre, the bodies were thrown into mass graves in order to hide what had happened. After the genocide, the mass graves were dug up, and some of the bodies were preserved with limestone and placed back in the classrooms in order to show people the awful things that occurred in this place.
I wasn't sure how i was going to react to the memorial- would i be emotional? Would i shut down and feel numb? I had only ever seen one dead body up close, and that had been my grandmother right before she was buried. I knew that the bodies wouldn't look like she had, because we would be seeing them 16 years after their last heartbeat. My first impression when we got to the site took me by surprise. I was struck by how beautiful the surroundings were. There were rolling green hills, houses nestled into the hillsides, and wildflowers spread throughout the grass creating patches of bright, beautiful color. However, my thoughts of the beauty of the location were quickly surmounted by the immense gravity and deep sadness of the situation that had occurred there.
Our guide told us a little bit about the school that was being built there, how it had turned into the site of a massacre, and the role that the French soldiers played when they set up camp there shortly after the massacre. We then walked to the first block of classrooms. I was towards the back of the group, so I saw everyone walking into the first classroom, and the looks on the faces of the first couple of people who walked out. As it was my turn to go in, I hesitated and had a moment of panic about what I was about to see. However, I continued to put one foot in front of the other, almost as if in a daze, and was then standing beside a row of preserved bodies. Some of the bodies were missing hands or other limbs, heads were separated from bodies, and some faces were forever stuck in looks of fear or pain. I felt torn between wanting to avert my eyes so that I was not staring at the bodies of these people who were killed in such cruel circumstances, and the urge to really look at them and implant their image in my mind so that i would never forget the affects of what happened there. One of the things that struck me about the bodies as I walked through the classrooms was that I could create no real picture and almost any picture in my head of these people, because from looking a these preserved bodies, they could have been anyone. Many of the Tutsi were identified during the genocide by their looks, however these features that had led to their death have faded into anonymous, partly decomposed body parts. While it did feel connected to all the Rwandan history i have been learning about, it also felt like a universal genocide memorial because it made me think about how these bodies could be the remains of anyone.
When i began to think of how each of these bodies had been a real person with hopes, dreams, problems and pasts, it became very overwhelming. It became even more overwhelming when i thought about how the bodies were just a small percentage of the people killed in this massacre, let alone in the entire genocide. However, I tried to control these thoughts and focus on the place i was in and the images that i was seeing in the moment. The thought that kept running through my head was, "what a waste." The lives of so many people were ended prematurely because of a lot of hate a socially constructed differences. From learning the history that led up to the genocide, I understand in a step-by-step sort of way how it happened, but on an abstract and ideological level, it is still so difficult for me to comprehend.
As I walked through the rooms of Murambi, I was somehow both numb and internally emotional, but not externally emotional. Though it sounds impossible to be both numb and emotional and the same time, it was such a mix of thoughts, emotions and feelings cycling through my head. The moment it all became real for me was when as i was coming out of the last classroom, I caught a glance of one of the four survivors from the massacre standing about 20 feet away. He was just standing there, watching us experience only a tiny portion of what he had experienced here 15 years ago. While this was a topic of study for us, this was his reality. He had sought refuge in this school and had been one of the extremely tiny percentage to come out alive. Seeing him made the whole thing so much more real because it somehow gave a face to those nearly faceless bodies, because though he was alive and they were dead, it could have just as easily been him in one of those rooms. That sounds absolutely awful to say, but it struck me really hard and it was at that moment that my emotions really took a hold of me.
As we exited the main hall of the school and walked to the hillside where the mass graves had once been, I was partially transported back to the present day. Though those harrowing images were still stuck in my mind, the sun was shining and i could hear children laughing and playing nearby. It seemed like such a strange contrast, but it showed me that life really just does have to go on. The genocide survivors who i have met here have all said this and it has been hard to comprehend, but it is true. It does no good to live solely mourning the past, and it is necessary to move into the future. The sound of children laughing was the most beautiful sound after just seeing such death and destruction, and left me with a sense of hope for both the healing of the people of Rwanda and humanity as a whole.
We were staying in singles in a hostel on campus, and none of us wanted to sleep alone that night. We moved all the furniture out of two of the rooms and moved all of the mattresses into those two rooms. After such an intense and emotionally draining day, we wanted to just be together, listen to music and try to get our minds off of the bad things in the world. After dinner, all 13 people in my group (12 girls and 1 guy) put on our pajamas, grabbed our pillows and headed to the room dubbed the "sleepover room." It was so nice to just relax, flush through some of our thoughts together, and then sing really loudly to bad (and good) american music. The door barely opened because of all the mattresses filling the room, and at one point the nun who works there knocked on the door. We immediately jumped onto Lewie (the one guy) so she wouldn't see him, but we realized that was pointless since the door only opened a couple of inches anyway. Luckily, she had come to ask what time we wanted breakfast and not to tell us to stop singing or ask about out crazy rearrangement of furniture. It must have looked truly bizarre though. Needless to say, we slept in the two mattress filled rooms (well, besides Lewie), happy for the company of friends.
We stayed in Butare for two more days, but i will have to write about the rest next time because it is beginning to get dark and i have to get home! But get excited to hear about this past weekend, I'll give you a sneak preview: it involves knee-deep mud, a gorilla and a volcano!
On Sunday, my family took me to church with them. It was an enormous room that looked like a big gym or community center, with very little indication that it was in fact a church. The service was conducted both in Kinyerwanda and Swahili, with two people leading the service in two languages at the exact same time. I was definitely a little confused about what was going on at first! A couple of minutes into the service a man came and motioned for me to follow him. He took me to the side of the front of the church, where two chairs were sitting side by side. Another man came and sat down beside me and told me that he was the translator. He sat next to me for the entire three hour and 15 minute service, translating everything into English. The songs were beautiful, and it was clear that the service was affecting many of the congregants strongly, as some started crying or were singing with looks of pain, anguish, or hope on their faces during the different songs. Religion is a very big part of life here and has played a very interesting part both in the genocide and in reconciliation efforts, but i will write more about that when i have more time.
Last week, my group spent the first three days in a city in Southern Rwanda called Butare. We were staying on the campus of the National University of Rwanda. On the way to Butare, we stopped at the Murambi Genocide Memorial. Before the genocide, they were building a vocational school on this hilltop. When the genocide began, messages spread on the radio told Tutsi to go to the school to seek refuge. It was all a trap, however, because one day in April in 1994, Hutu militia came to kill everyone that was hiding there. About 50,000 people were killed, and only four people survived. After the massacre, the bodies were thrown into mass graves in order to hide what had happened. After the genocide, the mass graves were dug up, and some of the bodies were preserved with limestone and placed back in the classrooms in order to show people the awful things that occurred in this place.
I wasn't sure how i was going to react to the memorial- would i be emotional? Would i shut down and feel numb? I had only ever seen one dead body up close, and that had been my grandmother right before she was buried. I knew that the bodies wouldn't look like she had, because we would be seeing them 16 years after their last heartbeat. My first impression when we got to the site took me by surprise. I was struck by how beautiful the surroundings were. There were rolling green hills, houses nestled into the hillsides, and wildflowers spread throughout the grass creating patches of bright, beautiful color. However, my thoughts of the beauty of the location were quickly surmounted by the immense gravity and deep sadness of the situation that had occurred there.
Our guide told us a little bit about the school that was being built there, how it had turned into the site of a massacre, and the role that the French soldiers played when they set up camp there shortly after the massacre. We then walked to the first block of classrooms. I was towards the back of the group, so I saw everyone walking into the first classroom, and the looks on the faces of the first couple of people who walked out. As it was my turn to go in, I hesitated and had a moment of panic about what I was about to see. However, I continued to put one foot in front of the other, almost as if in a daze, and was then standing beside a row of preserved bodies. Some of the bodies were missing hands or other limbs, heads were separated from bodies, and some faces were forever stuck in looks of fear or pain. I felt torn between wanting to avert my eyes so that I was not staring at the bodies of these people who were killed in such cruel circumstances, and the urge to really look at them and implant their image in my mind so that i would never forget the affects of what happened there. One of the things that struck me about the bodies as I walked through the classrooms was that I could create no real picture and almost any picture in my head of these people, because from looking a these preserved bodies, they could have been anyone. Many of the Tutsi were identified during the genocide by their looks, however these features that had led to their death have faded into anonymous, partly decomposed body parts. While it did feel connected to all the Rwandan history i have been learning about, it also felt like a universal genocide memorial because it made me think about how these bodies could be the remains of anyone.
When i began to think of how each of these bodies had been a real person with hopes, dreams, problems and pasts, it became very overwhelming. It became even more overwhelming when i thought about how the bodies were just a small percentage of the people killed in this massacre, let alone in the entire genocide. However, I tried to control these thoughts and focus on the place i was in and the images that i was seeing in the moment. The thought that kept running through my head was, "what a waste." The lives of so many people were ended prematurely because of a lot of hate a socially constructed differences. From learning the history that led up to the genocide, I understand in a step-by-step sort of way how it happened, but on an abstract and ideological level, it is still so difficult for me to comprehend.
As I walked through the rooms of Murambi, I was somehow both numb and internally emotional, but not externally emotional. Though it sounds impossible to be both numb and emotional and the same time, it was such a mix of thoughts, emotions and feelings cycling through my head. The moment it all became real for me was when as i was coming out of the last classroom, I caught a glance of one of the four survivors from the massacre standing about 20 feet away. He was just standing there, watching us experience only a tiny portion of what he had experienced here 15 years ago. While this was a topic of study for us, this was his reality. He had sought refuge in this school and had been one of the extremely tiny percentage to come out alive. Seeing him made the whole thing so much more real because it somehow gave a face to those nearly faceless bodies, because though he was alive and they were dead, it could have just as easily been him in one of those rooms. That sounds absolutely awful to say, but it struck me really hard and it was at that moment that my emotions really took a hold of me.
As we exited the main hall of the school and walked to the hillside where the mass graves had once been, I was partially transported back to the present day. Though those harrowing images were still stuck in my mind, the sun was shining and i could hear children laughing and playing nearby. It seemed like such a strange contrast, but it showed me that life really just does have to go on. The genocide survivors who i have met here have all said this and it has been hard to comprehend, but it is true. It does no good to live solely mourning the past, and it is necessary to move into the future. The sound of children laughing was the most beautiful sound after just seeing such death and destruction, and left me with a sense of hope for both the healing of the people of Rwanda and humanity as a whole.
We were staying in singles in a hostel on campus, and none of us wanted to sleep alone that night. We moved all the furniture out of two of the rooms and moved all of the mattresses into those two rooms. After such an intense and emotionally draining day, we wanted to just be together, listen to music and try to get our minds off of the bad things in the world. After dinner, all 13 people in my group (12 girls and 1 guy) put on our pajamas, grabbed our pillows and headed to the room dubbed the "sleepover room." It was so nice to just relax, flush through some of our thoughts together, and then sing really loudly to bad (and good) american music. The door barely opened because of all the mattresses filling the room, and at one point the nun who works there knocked on the door. We immediately jumped onto Lewie (the one guy) so she wouldn't see him, but we realized that was pointless since the door only opened a couple of inches anyway. Luckily, she had come to ask what time we wanted breakfast and not to tell us to stop singing or ask about out crazy rearrangement of furniture. It must have looked truly bizarre though. Needless to say, we slept in the two mattress filled rooms (well, besides Lewie), happy for the company of friends.
We stayed in Butare for two more days, but i will have to write about the rest next time because it is beginning to get dark and i have to get home! But get excited to hear about this past weekend, I'll give you a sneak preview: it involves knee-deep mud, a gorilla and a volcano!
Thursday, February 11, 2010
Homestay
I've now been in Rwanda for five days, though it feels like a lot longer! We have now moved into our homestays and settled into our schedule and classes. I am taking a class on Post Conflict Transformation, National and Ethnic Identity, Field Study and then my Independent Study which will be for the last month. I moved in with my host family the day before yesterday. The family consists of a mom, dad, six kids and the grandparents and an uncle that lives with them, so it is a busy household! The first night was difficult because there is SOO much to adjust to and it's hard to know what you're supposed to do, how things work, etc, especially because a lot of the family doesn't speak english. Most people here speak Kinyerwanda and French, but i've been finding more and more people who speak english. And, i've had a lot of opportunities to practice my Kinyerwanda! I guess foreigners don't generally know the language, so the people here LOVE IT when we try to speak Kinyerwanda (and they enjoy laughing at our attempts!) I have to go catch the bus because it's getting dark, but I promise a long post soon!!
Sunday, February 7, 2010
Kampala and Kigali!!
Hello everyone!!
I can't believe I've been here now for almost a week! After my two ten hour plane rides, an 8 hour layover in amsterdam (with some snow-filled exploring!), an hour long plane ride, a lost bag, and about 7 hours in the ugandan airport, I arrived in Kampala! there is so much to say and so little time to write, but i will try to summarize as best as possible!
We stayed in a hotel in Kampala for 4 nights for the first part of orientation with everyone in the program (there are 27 of us). We did various orientation-type sessions (like talking about fears, expectations, ground rules, academic components, culture shock, etc), had some time to explore Kampala, went to the tombs of the Bagandan kings, saw the university, and had various other adventures! Kampala is a very crowded city with CRAZYY traffic (you literally just run across the street and hope to not get hit... there are no traffic light or crosswalks, or many rules when it comes to driving. i learned very quickly that pedestrians do not have the right of way!!) One night when we were free to have dinner wherever we wanted, i ended up having dinner at the house of a ugandan family. one of the girls in my program had met a ugandan girl our age the week before (she got here early) and when we went to visit her at the shop she works at, she invited us over for dinner! she lives with her two older sisters (one is 24 and one is 27) and her younger brother (the rest of their family still lives in the village that they are from) and they live in a part of the city that i had never been to before. it was so wonderful! when we first got to their house the electricity was out, so we sat in their living room lit by candlelight and they taught us how to eat jackfruit,it was like nothing i had ever had before! (Gwen, the texture would have been a huuuuge issue for you, haha). then the power went on and we all sat around the living room and made dinner (chopped up all different types of veggies and then put them over boiled potatoes) talking about our love lives, the ugandan economy, the war, school, and making fun of the soap opera that was playing on the tv. It was so nice to have such a wonderful and genuine interaction with ugandans around our age that we had just met, they were so warm and welcoming!!
yesterday our group of 27 split into two groups, and one went to gulu in northern uganda and one went to kigali, to capital of rwanda, and we will switch in a month. my group had a 12 hr bus ride from kampala to kigali, it was such a beautiful drive! we arrived at about 6pm and two of the other people on the program and i went on a walk to explore kigali. we ended up walking really far and getting sort of lost, but we eventually found our way back in time for dinner! we had our first kinyerwanda class today! they speak mostly kinyerwanda and french here which is definitely something to get used to after kampala, where nearly everyone knew english. i move in with my host family on tues, but up until then we are staying in a hotel and there is a balcony right outside my door that looks out over kigali, soooo beautiful!!
Ok, I need to run- we're about to go to an Ethiopian restaurant for dinner, but I love you all and hope that everything is going well with you! New York people, i hear it is snowing there! So hard to imagine in the heat here! Please write to me and tell me how you are doing, i miss you guys!
love love love,
frees
I can't believe I've been here now for almost a week! After my two ten hour plane rides, an 8 hour layover in amsterdam (with some snow-filled exploring!), an hour long plane ride, a lost bag, and about 7 hours in the ugandan airport, I arrived in Kampala! there is so much to say and so little time to write, but i will try to summarize as best as possible!
We stayed in a hotel in Kampala for 4 nights for the first part of orientation with everyone in the program (there are 27 of us). We did various orientation-type sessions (like talking about fears, expectations, ground rules, academic components, culture shock, etc), had some time to explore Kampala, went to the tombs of the Bagandan kings, saw the university, and had various other adventures! Kampala is a very crowded city with CRAZYY traffic (you literally just run across the street and hope to not get hit... there are no traffic light or crosswalks, or many rules when it comes to driving. i learned very quickly that pedestrians do not have the right of way!!) One night when we were free to have dinner wherever we wanted, i ended up having dinner at the house of a ugandan family. one of the girls in my program had met a ugandan girl our age the week before (she got here early) and when we went to visit her at the shop she works at, she invited us over for dinner! she lives with her two older sisters (one is 24 and one is 27) and her younger brother (the rest of their family still lives in the village that they are from) and they live in a part of the city that i had never been to before. it was so wonderful! when we first got to their house the electricity was out, so we sat in their living room lit by candlelight and they taught us how to eat jackfruit,it was like nothing i had ever had before! (Gwen, the texture would have been a huuuuge issue for you, haha). then the power went on and we all sat around the living room and made dinner (chopped up all different types of veggies and then put them over boiled potatoes) talking about our love lives, the ugandan economy, the war, school, and making fun of the soap opera that was playing on the tv. It was so nice to have such a wonderful and genuine interaction with ugandans around our age that we had just met, they were so warm and welcoming!!
yesterday our group of 27 split into two groups, and one went to gulu in northern uganda and one went to kigali, to capital of rwanda, and we will switch in a month. my group had a 12 hr bus ride from kampala to kigali, it was such a beautiful drive! we arrived at about 6pm and two of the other people on the program and i went on a walk to explore kigali. we ended up walking really far and getting sort of lost, but we eventually found our way back in time for dinner! we had our first kinyerwanda class today! they speak mostly kinyerwanda and french here which is definitely something to get used to after kampala, where nearly everyone knew english. i move in with my host family on tues, but up until then we are staying in a hotel and there is a balcony right outside my door that looks out over kigali, soooo beautiful!!
Ok, I need to run- we're about to go to an Ethiopian restaurant for dinner, but I love you all and hope that everything is going well with you! New York people, i hear it is snowing there! So hard to imagine in the heat here! Please write to me and tell me how you are doing, i miss you guys!
love love love,
frees
Wednesday, January 27, 2010
Ecuador
From January 7-January 17th I was in Ecuador with this wonderful group of women. I feel like there is soooo much to say about it and in the midst of packing for Uganda and trying to get ready for this next adventure, I’m afraid I won’t be able to adequately describe it… but, nonetheless, here is my attempt!
We lived at this beautiful hacienda that is home to the NGO we were working with, FBU. (You can read more about it here: http://www.fbu.com.ec/fbu_ecuador.htm) Our day began each morning when we heard the breakfast bell ringing from downstairs (though breakfast was at a set time, it was really “when the bell rings” which was refreshing and set a different pace). We’d all make our way downstairs and sit at the enormous table that fit all 18 of us and was decorated with colorful fresh flowers from the garden, with the sun shining in through the window that filled the whole wall. My favorite parts of breakfast each day were the warm milk from the cows that had been milked that morning (into which we added coco powder or coffee powder, so good!) and the scrambled eggs. I don’t usually have strong feelings about scrambled eggs, but these seemed to taste so different than any other scrambled eggs I’d ever had! I wish I had asked how they made them, because the scrambled eggs I made when I got home just did not measure up. Pretty much all of the food we ate there was from the farm/garden and it felt so cleansing to know exactly where the food I was eating had come from, and to be eating all fresh, organic foods. It made me much more aware of what I was putting into my body, and it felt good to be eating good things!
This is Ana and I with two of the women who run the movement for Women's Reproductive and Sexual Rights in Ecuador
Each day was completely different and completely wonderful. Though we were doing different things each day, there was a nice routine to it, and I really enjoyed that time was more based on what we had just done or what we were about to do, and less based on the timing of a mechanized clock. Most days we had breakfast, let the food settle and got ourselves together, did something in the morning, had lunch in the early afternoon (around 2:30ish), did something in the afternoon, had dinner (around 7:30ish), had a group discussion, did some sort of other activity (like have a bonfire, have a dance party with the Ecuadorian high school students we were staying with, etc.) and then hung out in our rooms together. During the day we spoke with amazing people who are all working to improve the situation in their communities in some way. Some of them were running women’s rights type organizations and some were running other community based organizations and were the first women to have the position they held. Some of them were focused on other issues in the community, like promoting eco-agriculture, helping to teach the local community organic farming practices, or were teachers in the local school. Each person had so much information and perspective to share with us, and I felt myself really engaging in each conversation in a way that I’m not sure I always do in a classroom in school. It felt so real and invigorating to be learning about the issues from the people who are taking them head on, instead of through some random website or an outdated book. It was both exciting and upsetting, because though we were learning the ways in which these people are dedicating their effort, their time and their spirit to try to improve people’s lives in their communities, some of the obstacles they are fighting against are so large and powerful- the government, oil companies, foreign rose plantation owners… the list goes on. It’s so frustrating that they have to tackle these enormous powers over things that they shouldn’t have to be fighting for in the first place (like the right to prevent one of the most biodiverse habitats in the world from being turned into an oil mine) but it is inspiring to hear from the people who are up for the challenge and who are putting all their love and effort into what they believe in.
I recently saw this in an article (you can read the rest of the article here: http://www.utne.com/Spirituality/The-Art-of-a-Lively-Conversation.aspx) and it made me think of how we often do not really open up to people and share what we are really thinking about and feeling, but those inhibitions seemed to melt away while we were in Ecuador, creating a space for real, honest dialogue. “Finding oneself in a good conversation is rather like stumbling on a beautiful square in a foreign city at night—and then never knowing how to get back there in daytime. Why do conversations go wrong? Shyness has a lot to answer for. We get scared of opening our souls because we falsely exaggerate the difference between ourselves and others. We imagine that others don’t share in our vulnerabilities or interests. We display only our strengths—and hence become boring, for it is in the revelation of our weaknesses, in the display of our mortality in all its dimensions, that people grow sympathetic….We should be braver. An evening comes alive when we meet people who express our very own thoughts, but with a clarity and psychological accuracy we could not match. They know us better than we know ourselves. What was shy and confused within us is unapologetically and cogently phrased in them, our pleasure at the meeting indicating that we have found a piece of ourselves, a sentence or two built of the very substance of which our own minds are made. The dinner party companion has located words to depict a situation we thought ourselves alone in feeling, and for a few moments, we are like two lovers on an early dinner date thrilled to discover how much they share (and so unable to do more than graze at the food in front of them).” Both the formal group discussions that we had each night, and the individual conversations that they sparked at meals, while lying in the sun, or in our rooms before bed, were so unlike conversations that a group of people who previously barely knew each other would have- at the risk of sounding corny, I’m going to go ahead and say it was pretty magical. During this short amount of time, I felt like we created one of the strongest communities I have ever been a part of because of our willingness to give of ourselves to each other by sharing our pasts, thoughts, ideas, inconsistencies and vulnerabilities. By sharing these parts of ourselves that are not on the surface during our day-to-day lives, we were able to immediately shed the superficial layers and quickly move to more meaningful relationships. Because we then had a strong basis to move from, our discussions were more nuanced, our questions dug deeper and our answers were more honest. I wish that this form of relationship-building was more commonly practiced in our day to day lives, but in the fast-paced world that we live in (well at least at Columbia) I think its hard for people to find time to just sit and talk, and enjoy each other’s presence. Though it sometimes may really be a lack of time, I think it really is a mindset issue; we can make the time if we make it a priority. And I’m definitely not advocating dropping the other things we do to just sit around and talk all the time, but I do think that we get so wrapped up in our responsibilities and to-do lists, that we forget how important it is to value and nurture our relationships. I hope to keep this in mind as I head to a new place where I know absolutely no one, and as I eventually return to reconnect with all of the wonderful people in my life in the US.
Just to quickly some up some of the other stuff we did… we learned how to milk a cow (and got unlucky in our timing, I guess the cow decided to leave us with something to remember her by and relieved herself while we were crowded around her- cow poop splashes all around!), painted a mural in the local school, taught an English lesson at this school (i.e. taught them the song “head, shoulders, knees and toes” and then played a bunch of fun games) learned about indigenous beliefs, had some pretty intense games of Uno, Twister and Apples to Apples, played soccer with the Ecuadorian high school students, watered plants as part of a reforestation project, worked on the farm, petted a two-day old calf (sooo cute!!), straddled the Equator, climbed a volcano, swam in natural hot springs surrounded on all sides by mountains (I apparently almost kicked our tour guide in the face during my brief synchro demonstration…oops!), sat around a roaring bonfire, tried many different fruits for the first time, saw the most incredible starry sky (Ecuador is the only place you can see both northern and southern constellations), and played dress-up with some pretty adorable children! It was so nice to not worry about time, to be free from technology, and to just enjoy each other’s company in such a beautiful place!
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